Would You Rather: A Memoir of Growing Up and Coming Out by Katie Heaney

Would You Rather cover



I received this ARC from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. This has no influence on my rating. 

Would You Rather: A Memoir of Growing Up and Coming Out will be released on March 6th, 2018.

4/5 – This year, I wanted to read a non-fiction book by a queer author about being queer. This spoke out to me when I saw it on Netgalley because it was exactly what I was looking for. What I didn’t expect was to relate so strongly with the author’s experience in coming out later in life and finding out who she was at the age of twenty-eight.

Katie Heaney wrote a book called Never Have I Ever: My Life (So Far) Without a Date and it was released in 2014. She references this book often in Would You Rather because, in it, she describes never having dated, being a virgin at twenty-five, and being attracted to men. At the time she wrote that book, she had not accepted that she was a lesbian. She might not have even known despite the signs she points out in Would You Rather.

It is fascinating to have two different books, written at two different points in your life that demonstrate how things can change over the course of just a few years. At twenty-five, she is single, straight, and a virgin and at twenty-eight she has a girlfriend, is a lesbian, and is no longer a virgin. I love how candid she is about talking about her journey in coming out to her friends and family and how at first she didn’t feel “gay enough” because she hadn’t ever dated a woman. I related to her story for a number of reasons, but I’m not as candid as she is. I don’t think I would ever write, let alone publish not just one but two books detailing my love life and sexuality. I admire Heaney greatly because of it. She talks about how she continued to get emails after her first book was released from young women who related to her story and I know she will get emails for Would You Rather for the same thing.

I thought the content of the book was great, I wasn’t too fond of the format. The book is described as a series of essays and sometimes the book flowed nicely and sometimes it didn’t. I would’ve liked if the book flowed all the way through and didn’t feel as if there were unrelated essays mixed in. That being said, I loved the essay about Heaney downloading and watching The L Word for the first time while she was studying abroad. There was even an essay where she talked about her anxiety and how she had been resistant to medication before accepting she needed it. Again, I really appreciated her openness throughout the memoir about her journey and I would highly recommend it.

3 thoughts on “Would You Rather: A Memoir of Growing Up and Coming Out by Katie Heaney

  1. Wow, okay, this sounds like the content I want to be reading. Sorry to hear the essays didn’t flow that well, but I often pick up a book, put it down for a while, then pick it up again, so maybe I won’t even notice, haha.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It was really good! I was so happy to read about someone who was going through similar experiences. Even though the format wasn’t my favorite it was really easy to pick up and put down, which was helpful because I wasn’t reading a lot in February. I look forward to hearing what you think!

      – Chantel

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: February Wrap-Up | BW Book Reviews

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s